Marital Communication

One of the basics for having a great marriage is developing healthy communication.  Anyone who has been married for more than a few days will tell you how important healthy communication is.  Everything from the way you look at your spouse, your tone of voice, how or what you text or email, and finally the specific words that you choose to use when talking with each other are all essential for getting your point across to your spouse.  But you also have to take into account what perspective your spouse will have when receiving your message.  Are they in a good mood, are they guarded emotionally, do they have baggage that will jade the message you are trying to communicate?  Knowing your spouse and attempting to communicate in a way that they will receive accurately is just as important as how and what you say.  The problem with developing healthy communication is that there are so many ways for it to derail and go wrong.  For example, you may have the best intentions and be trying to compliment your wife and she misunderstands what you are attempting to communicate and gets frustrated with you.  It might be easy at that point to shut down or get defensive but the better response would be to delay your emotional response and clarify what message she received and why she responded the way she did.  This takes work and self sacrifice but in the long run it may save you from a lot of conflict and actually strengthen your marriage.  In the coming weeks I am going to share some insights I have on how to improve your marital communication.


Challenge:  Most of us communicate on automatic pilot, especially with our spouses.  Make an effort to think about what you are communicating with your spouse each time to talk to them.

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